The Grief of Rejection, 3.30.25
Grieving for my dad and having the grief for my estranged son hit me smack in the face again has kind of sent me into a tailspin this past week. I haven't slept through the night since the day of my dad's memorial service on March 22nd, which is also the first time I've seen my son since 2021. This post is pretty selfish on my part because I have to get it out of my head and into a space where someone might hear me. (Fair warning in case you want to swipe this page closed before reading on.) So, if you aren't familiar (I sincerely hope you aren't) let me tell you how the grief of estrangement feels: It's waking up and thinking everything is good, then remembering you are always/still without your child and the literal, physical ache in your heart and gut takes your breath away. It's the ruminating over every word or every act you ever made towards them that may have caused this. It's the feeling of guilt and regret causing the heat to rise up in yo...